Categories:
Humor,
Religion
Posted on Friday, 8 May 2009 12:10 by pfitz
Top 10 Sayings of Biblical Mothers
10. Samson! Get your hand out of that lion. You don’t know where it’s been! (Judges 14:5-8)
9. David! I told you not to play in the house with that sling! Go practice your harp. We pay good money for those lessons!
8. Abraham! Stop wandering around the countryside and get home for supper!
7. Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego! Leave those clothes outside, you smell like a dirty ol’ furnace!
6. Cain! Get off your brother! You’re going to kill him some day!
5. Noah! No, you can’t keep them! I told you, don’t bring home any more strays!
4. Gideon! Have you been hiding in that wine press again? Look at your clothes! (Judges 6:11)
3. James and John! No more burping contests at the dinner table, please. People are going to call you the sons of thunder! (Mark 3:17)
2. Judas! Have you been in my purse again?!
1. Jesus! What do you think, you were born in a barn?
Categories:
Miscellaneous Thoughts
Posted on Friday, 8 May 2009 9:18 by pfitz
In honor of Mother’s Day this Sunday, I’ll be posting a couple Pfunnies dedicated to moms.
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TEN SIGNS OF A FRUSTRATED MOTHER
1. Your children know how to read HTML code but can’t operate a vacuum cleaner.
2. Your children tell you that you said “yes” and you don’t even remember the question.
3. You go to the grocery store and find yourself having a good time.
4. Your husband asks how your day went and you rate it on a scale of 1-10 repeats of “stop that!” or “no!”.
5. You can’t remember the last time you didn’t have to share your drink.
6. You mistakenly tell the kids it’s “sanity” time when you meant to say “bed” time.
7. The laundry seems to have taken on an evil nature and you begin to feel that it’s out to get you.
8. You dread hearing the phone ring because it’s a sure sign there’s about to be trouble amongst the children.
9. It’s finally your turn on the computer and “Lost” is just coming on.
10.You go to sleep with “I’m bored” or “I’m hungry” still ringing in your ears.
Na
