A guest in a posh hotel was at breakfast one morning and called over the head waiter.

He said, “Good morning, sir. I’d like two boiled eggs, one of them so undercooked that it’s runny, and the other so overcooked that it’s tough and hard to eat. Also, I want some grilled bacon that has been left out so it gets a bit on the cold side, burnt toast that crumbles away as soon as you touch it with a knife, and I’d like some butter straight from the freezer so that it’s impossible to spread. And I’d like a pot of weak coffee, lukewarm.”

“I’m sorry, sir.” said the bewildered waiter. “We cannot do that for you.”

The guest replied, “Oh? But that’s what I got yesterday!”