Remember how, during the opening credits of The Simpsons, Bart is always writing something on the blackboard? Every time you see something different and he’s been writing it repeatedly on the blackboard. There are several websites that list all the things Bart was being forced to write on each episode.

Here are some of my favorites:

I will not waste chalk.
I will not barf unless I’m sick.
I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
I will not conduct my own fire drills.
I will return the seeing-eye dog.
I will not call my teacher “Hot Cakes.”
This punishment is not boring and meaningless.
I will not trade pants with others.
A burp is not an answer.
Teacher is not a leper.
I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.
I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
Goldfish don’t bounce.
I will not grease the monkey bars.
No one is interested in my underpants.
I will not torment the emotionally frail.
I am not a dentist.
Nobody likes sunburn slappers.
My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man.
Hamsters cannot fly.
Indian burns are not our cultural heritage.
I will not use abbrev.
I will stop talking about the twelve inch pianist.
I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface.
I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.
Beans are neither fruit nor musical.
Cursive writing does not mean what I think it does.